Joke Barrage 2

Senaryo: Restaurant

Customer: Waitress! Ano ba ‘tong binigay mo sa akin, kape o tsaa? Lasang gas ‘to ah!
Waitress: Kung yan ay lasang gas, Kape yan! Ang tsaa kasi lasang pintura!

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Jinggoy: Dad, bakit ba maalat at may asin sa dagat?

Erap: Sinadya yan ni Lord para sa ganun hindi mapanis ang mga isda...

Joke Barrage 1

Let's try posting some jokes here in my blog. More are from my Inbox. Hope you'll like it.


Host: Name a part of your body which starts with letter N
Contestant: Knee!!!!!

Titser: Pedro, 3+1
Pedro: 4, ma’am
Titser: Korek, ikaw naman Inday, 1+3?
Inday: Pambihira, yan na nga ba sinasabi ko eh, pag mahirap na yung tanong, ako na lang lagi!!!!

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Titser: Sino ang may gustong pumunta sa langit?

Lahat nagtaasan ng kamay pwera lang si Pedro

Titser: Bakit ikaw Pedro ayaw mo?
Pedro: Eh kasi ma’am, pinapauwi ako ng maaga ng nanay ko eh, gagabihin po ba?

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Titser: Class, sino si Jose Rizal?
Juan: Mam di ko po kilala
Titser: Ikaw, Pepe?
Pepe: Di rin po
Titser: Di ninyo kilala si Jose Rizal?
Pedro: Mam baka po nasa kabilang section

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Abogado: Miss, pwede mo bang i-describe yung hitsura ng nang-rape sa iyo?
Babae: maitim, panot, puro pimples,pango ang ilong, bungal
suspek: sige miss, mang-asar ka pa!!!!

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Dok: Simula ngayon, bawal na sa iyo ang karne, seafoods lang ang pwede mong kainin
Pedro: Ano ho yon?
Dok: Mga hayop na lumalangoy

KINABUKASAN:
Misis ni Pedro: Nasan ang amo mo inday?
Inday: Nasa swimming pool po tinuturuang lumangoy yung baboy!!!!

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Mare: di yata nagustuhan ni pare ang birthday gift mo
Misis: Oo nga eh, 7 months na di pa ginagamit
Mare: eh ano ba ang regalo mo?
Misis:Memorial Plan

Why Lazy Susan

Aren’t you wondering why that circular tray that spins around called as Lazy Susan? Well according to an earliest documentation, it was named after one of the common name of the servant which is Susan, during the early times. And Lazy might refer to the hostess rather than called servant or to the ease of rotation in bringing the desired section of the tray to a position directly in front of the guest who could be lazy, as well. Hehehe.

Quit Smoking, Save Money

The Canadian Cancer Society creates an online calculator that can show you how much a smoker gains - both physically and financially - by cutting out smoking. try to visit the site here.

Web Hosting Site

For beginners in web development, who don’t have any idea on where to upload web pages into the web. Hosting site is the answer. There are a lot of hosting site around us some are free some are not and since you are a beginner try to pick first from different free hosting site. There are many free hosting sites that can provide you enough disk space and bandwidth to accommodate your website like here, here and here. Some free hosting websites are definitely free and are able to support MySQL and PHP. Unlike Yahoo! Geocities wherein you can only upload static pages, free hosting sites can drive you to create dynamic pages.

What's your worth?

Are you the type of person who always experience something like being on a mental block when being asked, what is your expected salary? Well here are some tips that I can suggest.

Surf the net. Human resource site like asia vault have a list that details what someone in an specific profession should earn. Hope it can give you some idea.

Ask around. Friends and associates in your line of work can advise you. Just be sure you ask them politely.

Check the ads. Look for the salary ranges in job advertisements (like newspaper or different online classified ads such as jobstreet and jobsdb) in your field.
Assess your self. Consider the value you can bring to the organization.

Go to Mars through Google Mars

At First Google shows us the Google Maps and the Google Earth. Now Google gives Google Mars. In Google Mars you can zoom into Mars and look at its surface.

Google never stops in giving us the opportunity to see everything, in just one click. Go check Google Mars for yourself now.

Robotic Ball

Technology never stops to amaze me. A few months ago, I read a news, here, about a monkey who was able to control its artificial robotic arm attached directly to its brain. And now, I have read news about a robotic ball that moves around and can work 24/7 as security surveillance object, known as, Rotundus.

It’s a ball that can move forward, backward, left, and right. It can brake anytime it wishes. You can read more about it here. Such a great news in technology.